This past week, I spoke with two different people who I felt were so inspiring. Both of them separately told me about how they stood up for themselves recently at their jobs – in a big way - and they both afterwards said the EXACT same thing to me:
“I feel SO EMPOWERED!”
Going from feeling like a doormat to standing in your truth will do just that.
And let me tell you they were both BEAMING. The energy from each of these women during our conversations was incredible. These ladies were (are) positive, radiant and proud of what they did.
When we take steps in our lives to feel less like a victim, we absolutely feel more empowered. And you know what? Both women also happened to mention to me that they think they could have done this sooner, but fear got in the way. (All happens in perfect, divine timing, though.) Both also said they felt both nervous and excited prior to their assertive actions.
What happens is that once we mindfully stand up for ourselves assertively (not passively or aggressively), and once we step into our truth more, things start flowing for us in our lives even more and amazing things start to happen. One action triggered a host of positive emotions. The CONFIDENCE that these ladies were projecting was nothing short of admirable.
And the truth is that the more you stand in your truth, the more authentic you’ll feel. When you are authentically YOU, the ripple effect occurs, too. People will notice your energy and many will likely be inspired by your actions.
These ladies were both feeling like themselves, even though one them said her boss was so shocked because he was used to treating her like a doormat. (Standing in her truth is the REAL her, though: strong, confident and definitely not a victim.)
Often times when we stand up for ourselves it helps other people as well. For example, in both of these situations standing up for themselves also will help other employees for various reasons.
Situations show up in our lives for a reason. Maybe the purpose is to learn something or to give us an opportunity to strengthen a skill. And often times after we learn particular lessons we’re able to teach others - either directly or indirectly - what we learned from our experience.
And of course stepping out of our comfort zones usually brings an opportunity for growth.
My clients and I talk a lot about boundaries as a part of self-care. Communicating your needs to others can also demonstrate self-respect. Reminds me of that phrase “you teach people how to treat you.” And no one can argue with how you FEEL.
There will be people in our lives who want to dominate our energy for various reasons. It is up to us to recognize this and know that it’s not about us, it has everything to do with them. It’s up to us what we choose to do with this, however.
Is there something you’ve been resentful about that is just eating you away? Decide what you’re going to do about this, even if it is working through it to heal, letting it go and releasing it.
What would your future self say to your current self right now?
How about your highest self? What would your highest self do?
If you are stepping out and would like to practice your assertiveness in a particular situation, take a deep breath and prepare how you’d like to communicate in a way that does not attack the other person. It’s not about attacking or not taking the other person's point of view into consideration. (That would fall under aggressive.) Practice first or even role-play with someone you trust.
As you step into your truth and set boundaries, the better you'll feel (and the more people you'll help! :-))
Have you experienced a situation in which you were glad you stood up for yourself? Let us know in the comments below!